Journal of a Single Gal in Q8 - Episode Five

From last episode...

"As she settled under her umbrella at the beach, she greeted the sea, "my best friend" she thought to herself. Looking at her bag she noticed the card. Should I call, should I not call, random thoughts kept running through her head. There was only one thing to do that would be able to distract her. She picked up the latest issue of Cosmopolitan from her bag and began to flip through the pages.

Sooner or later she will have to answer herself of whether she was to call or not but for now, Cosmopolitan was keeping her happy."

No sooner had she began to read an interesting article on "How To improve your Love Life" her telephone rang. It was Lolita.

"Whach ya doing hon?" she asked.

"Reading an article on how to improve my love life or should I say lack of! What's up with you?" she asked.

"I'm over at the swimming pool and I have a seat saved for you. Come and join me, you know I hate the beach!" she answered.

She still couldn't understand how anyone could love tanning but hate the beach! At any rate, she figured she'd had enough solitude for the day and it was time to socialize.

As she gathered her belongings and headed for the pool she could hear DJ Crow's music blasting away. She took a deep breath and hoped that his mood was better than last week "please no house music" she mumbled to herself.

She was reassured by the sound of good music, the type that one could actually dance to but much to her surprise, she noticed a group of girls gathering around the DJ and were actually dancing! They were wearing their bikinis and their tatoes as they danced away for the whole club's entertainment.

Although she appreciated their "I-COULDN'T-GIVE-A-DAMN" attitude, she still couldn't understand how the demography of Kuwait had changed so much. She admitted that she had mixed feelings about the whole thing. This was not something you could see happen a few years ago. Yes, the new generation had a world of their own and no one was going to mess with them "But what guts they had!" she thought.

Although she'd felt that she wanted Kuwait to give up some of its restrictions but dancing around the pool with a bikini was definately a bit too much. Adding to the scene was the drooling that the men were doing while staring at the girls. The predators were observing their prey. She was tempted to go up to one particular guy and close his mouth, he had it wide open but that would mean she'd have to touch him which was a grossem thought. Looking around, she smirked to herself, all of sudden most men around the pool were getting the sudden urge to itch! "Perverts!" she said.

Finally, she gave in to the feeling of disgust and headed to her friend and told her that she was leaving. She'd seen enough.

The next week had moved really fast. Her job was becoming more demanding everyday. She had been expecting that September was going to be busy but when it reached the point that she hardly had time to pee, it was getting to be frustrating.

By the time the weekend had arrived, she suddenly found herself sitting on her bed with the quiteness as she unconciously reached for the business card that she'd kept in her bag. She needed the excitement so she dialed the number and heard a recording "This number is no longer in service.". She couldn't stop laughing. Had she waited too long to call? Had it been a temporary number from the start? "Oh well" she thought. In a crazy way, she felt relief. Maybe it just wasn't meant to be, she concluded.

Her thoughts were interupted by the sound of the telephone. She knew who it was. It was her Mr. Big. This was always the case, whenever she found herself about to do something out of the ordinary, he'd call. It was like he felt it. She had no doubt that he was telepathically connected to her somehow and always knew something was up.

"Hi...listen.." he had the radio on. Mohammed Al-Jasmi was singing his famous song. He began to sing the words to her and she just listened. He had to have done something as cute as this, she thought to herself, typical! He knew her melting points. It was one of her favorite songs.

That was the trouble with her, she was a sucker for romance. She'd often blamed it on the fairytales that she'd watched as a child. It dawned on her one day when she'd past by her sister's house and found her neices watching Cinderalla. She was furious and told her sister that it wasn't right to have the kids watch it. Her sister just laughed and told her to take a chill pill! In the end, she found herself arguing about it in her head and wrote down her thoughts:

Too many movies on Love Conquering All
When I have kids, they can watch Hannibal
Cinderella a maid, no Prince nor ball
Plenty of lavish tears and a great steep fall

Bedtime stories shouldn't be Winnie the Pooh
They oughta be "Woman are from Venus & Men from Timbuktu"

Mind you, my kids can have their dreams
but only on "How to be a Millionaire" schemes

None of that Prince Charming mumbo jumbo
Just silly movies like Bambi or Dumbo

One is looking for its Mom, the other wants to fly
Perfect to share with kids and sure to make them cry

No more stories about Tarzan and Jane
why let them dream when it's all about pain

So spare the kids the agony in their little head
and stick to Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet...they both end up dead!

She was jolted back to reality by his next question. "How are your parents these days?" he asked. She thought it was a strange question. "What's that about?" she wondered. "They're fine," she answered.

"I hope they're not going to be travelling soon" he continued. She felt her stomach flip. "Why?" she asked. "Oh nothing" he replied. She could tell he was smiling when he said that. "They just got back so I don't expect they'll be going anywhere soon" she said. "Good" she heard him say, as her mind drifted away to other thoughts. Would he really actually propose? (Even though he knew that her Mom had rejected the idea a few years back?)

They'd been up and down this road before and she didn't think she had the energy to fight anymore. Come to think of it, lately she was beginning to think that being single was not such a bad thing. She had everything she needed. She had a good job, a family that loves her, plenty of friends, she could travel wherever she wanted, etc. In reality there were just a few key reasons that she should get married, one was to fill the void on those lonely nights (which lately weren't that many anyway) and two, to have kids.

Being an over worrier, she knew life would be tough. She'd smother her kids with worry. She actually imagined that she'd probably go with them to school just to make sure they were never bullied! It was silly but she knew herself. She was a worrier and it wasn't something that she could help. It wasn't easy being a "worse case scenario" person. She could just imagine the whole thing, first, she'd be pregnant and worry if the child had a defect or would be still born, once born, she'd worry if he'd be hit by a bus or run over by a car or have some fatal illness or just be be disappointed about love.

Yes, she felt pretty strong about not bringing children into the world so that she wouldn't see them be disappointed. In fact, she humbly admitted that she wasn't even sure if she could handle it! It may have felt bad to admit this but she appreciated the change in perspective. She used to just want to jump in and have kids without even considering the facts. Now, she's come to realise that it was a serious business and with her change of attitude she sensed that she was finally growing up.

She had to admit that if it wasn't for people's questions "Are you married?" or other comments, she really couldn't miss something that she'd never experienced. Her life was just fine the way it is, at least that's how she'd felt at that moment.

Then again, she asked herself, "if you really didn't want to get married, why then did you get butterflies in your stomach when he asked about your parents?" She knew the answer, for try as she may to say that she wasn't in love, in fact, she was deeply, deeply in love with him and he was the only person she'd consider marrying, if it wasn't for the obstacles. She needed a miracle and she needed it soon.

Their telephone conversation was coming to an end and he told her that he'd call her later. She needed her brain to stop over analyzing. She had to stop thinking about this particular subject. She needed some fresh air. She finally picked up the phone once again and dialled the number from the business card. This time there was no recording, it rang twice and she finally heard a voice saying "hello"....

"Is this Basil?" she asked.

To be continued...